The Year I Terrorized My Teenager (With Holiday Spirit, Obviously)

When my teenager decided she was too cool for me, I responded as any mature adult woman would—I broke into someone’s house to prove a point. It was festive. It was dramatic. It was the best Christmas she’ll never emotionally recover from.

By Jamie VanderLinden 2 min read
The Year I Terrorized My Teenager (With Holiday Spirit, Obviously)
Photo by Klim Musalimov / Unsplash

When my daughter turned fifteen, she suddenly developed that classic adolescent condition: Too Cool for Mom Syndrome. It’s developmental, it’s normal, blah blah blah—I’ve heard the research, but just because it’s normal doesn’t mean I have to take it lying down.

So naturally, I decided to prank her.

The Plot

Earlier that day, my coworker casually mentioned she had twenty-five Christmas trees in her house.

Twenty-five.

That was too good to pass up. So, that night, I invited my Scrooge of a child to grab hot chocolate and look at Christmas lights—like we used to, back when I was cool.

Yes, there was some guilting involved in getting her in the car, and it was well worth it.

At the precisely orchestrated moment, I pulled up to That House.

The Tree House.

The one with so many Christmas trees visible from the windows, it looked like Santa’s panic room.

green christmas tree with red baubles
Photo by Casey Murphy / Unsplash

I gasped and pointed—very dramatically—then put the car in park.
My daughter didn’t even look up.

“Yep, it’s great, Mom.”

I stepped out of the car like I was starring in my own Hallmark movie. Hands on hips. Soft smile. Holiday wonder radiating from my pores.

“Come look, honey. It’s so pretty.”

She hit me with the teenage slow blink—the one that says, without words, “I cannot believe I share DNA with you.”

I ignored her, glided up to the window, and pressed my face against the glass.

“Mom! MOM. You’re going to get ARRESTED. What are you DOING?”

Success – Exactly the reaction I was hoping for.

Encouraged, I crept to the front door… and opened it.

The Payoff

Inside stood my coworker—delighted, holding milk and cookies, loving that she was in on a prank and also had company to admire her hours' worth of effort decorating 25 Christmas trees on two floors of her home.

We cackled. We waited. We enjoyed our snacks.

My daughter eventually stomped in, outraged, betrayed, and still not convinced by how impressive I am at pranks.

She claims it was traumatic.
I call it holiday enrichment.
Either way, she’s still plotting revenge, which means I did something right.

Best. Christmas. Ever.

You gotta keep them on their toes. It helps you function... And teaches them life skills they're gonna need.​